Tax Vomit

Two months ago I decided I wasn’t going to play the game. I contacted my financial planner and we decided where to take $51,000 out of my portfolio. Not that it really makes a hill of beans. Finally the checks arrive and because I am slaving away on bath remodel, I asked dad I get the checks into the bank so they can clear as soon as possible. My plan was to write the check for the balance and get this mess behind me.

Since I need to know exactly what the interest and penalties are I called the IRS. Mistake.

In April the agent I spoke with outlined the interest as $285.82 and penalties as $510.00 for a 60 day extension (which by the way is merely a formality and I never received any paper work on this.) Since it is a few days less than 60 days, I thought the amount would be slightly less.

The first agent I spoke with could not process my request because she wasn’t authorized to handle this large amount. Suddenly I felt I was in the company of John Kenny and Tim Giethner. Big rollers.

Once transferred to the “non-stream line” department, I was told that my 2008 filing had not completed processing. Two months?

Last year when I owed $420 and was due a $420 "stimulus check" the IRS notified me two weeks after April 15th that my taxes were overdue and I owed an additional $7. They were not overdue. They misplaced my checked. Or more accurately they had my check but didn’t know what to do with it. And despite not knowing what to do with it they cashed it. Once the IRS figured out what they were doing, the seven dollars was dismissed and a couple months later I got my $420 stimulus check. Yahoo.

Today, the agent representing the IRS apologized, but he couldn't tell me how much I owed. Funny, how come the agent two months could tell me? He didn’t know. He suggested I send an extra $4000 when I said I would like to stop incurring additional interest and penalties. Like money grows on trees? Or better, I got my own printing department? Or I can get this from China?

There was a point when he got a little smart assed. “Well you should have paid your taxes to avoid the interest and penalties.”

“That is what I am trying to do and you can’t tell me what I owe. Yet, you keep hitting with with interest and penalties”

So I’m going to send them a check for the amount I was first told in April. Anyone want to bet this is the end?