My Aunt Eileen

What is the first memory of my Aunt Eileen? I don’t recall a particular incident or introduction. She married my Uncle Ralph when I was in grammar school.  I admit I was a bit jealous when I met her. After all, he called me, and still does, his favorite niece, but then I have heard him say that to my sisters.  Eileen too doted on us just like my father’s brother.

Both sets of grandparents lived in New Jersey so the family made the four hour drive to Sussex County for holidays and summer vacations. The Christmas Ralph and Eileen were married they gave my sister, Robin, and me a globe. The translucent fixture had an electric light in the middle of it. On that globe I found places like Fanning and Christmas Island in the Pacific Ocean. The amount of blue on the earth astonished me. Once late at night  I picked up an am radio station out of Quito.  I found Quito in Ecuador. And when I needed to know the capital of Idaho for a contest found in a bubble gum wrapper I used that globe. I just knew I was going to win.  Don’t remember what.

After my aunt and uncle were married they moved into the same house where Uncle Ralph and my father grew up. And while the globe was a great gift more importantly I learned Aunt Eileen gave a far greater gift to my grandparents by lovingly caring for my grandfather who ailed of Parkinson disease. She readily and willingly gave of herself. I never forgot her being there. For being a part of the family.

Yes, the family. I guess those are the first memories of Eileen. She entered the family a stranger, someone my uncle loved, and became my aunt. This was a relational transformation I had yet to experience. I was skeptical about how these things worked. Up until that point in my life everyone else who was a part of my family had already been a part of the family. Aunts. Uncles. Cousins. Grandparents.  They were either in place or born into it. Eileen was the first person I knew who came from outside the family to become part of the family. Because she married my uncle she was my aunt. Because she loved us like my uncle, she became my aunt.

My last memory was unfortunately this past July. I stopped in to see her when I returned to New York from Tennessee.  Uncle Ralph was at work so I spent an hour or so at her bedside. I chatted about the summer heat, my chainsaw exploits and other small talk, but eventually I talked about God and faith. This is not something I am really comfortable with, but I knew Aunt Eileen occasionally had someone from the church visit to share the word of God. Since Aunt Eileen’s eyesight had long surrendered to diabetes she couldn’t read her Bible.

I have no idea how I started this conversation, but before I knew it I had her Bible out and I was looking up verses and reading them. She thought a particular verse about judging others was in Psalms and she asked me to look it up.  Not being one who can keep the Books of the Bible in order I thought I would never find the verse she wanted.  I used my smart phone and the website Blue Letter Bible to locate “Judge not, that ye be not judged.” Matthew 7:1. 

I wish I could recall why she wanted me to look that verse up. Was it her favorite? I don’t know. I shared with her mine. It’s from Isaiah 30:21 “And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, "This is the way, walk in it," when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left.”  Eileen, bedridden for too many years, nevertheless walked in The Way.