The Scar

See the scar? Appendectomy. Three years ago, next week.

I remember being scared. Eight thousand miles away from home, I waited in a hospital ward with no sheets on the bed until my Peace Corps host Mother brought some from home. Cat roaming down the halls. No air conditioning. An orange M&M under the adjacent bed. Hard to believe that much time has passed. That day, I wanted to tell Mom and Dad, but couldn’t— fourteen time zones and urgency of getting me into the operating room. If it happened today, I couldn’t tell Mom.

Today, as I stared at the scar I reflected on the past three years. These thoughts came to me.

What was the most significant event? I had been in the Peace Corps, I sailed across the Pacific in the Cosmic Muffin, fell in love, wrote a book titled The Last Voyage of the Cosmic Muffin and got it published. Had my heart broke. I remodeled a kitchen, fixed a roof, painted a porch, all alone. I went on the road in my parents’ RV to promote my book, had a radio spot on Camping in the Zone,an RV program, moved to Tarpon Springs, Florida. None of that. It was the death of my mother. A year ago, just last year was the last time I saw her, heard her voice.

Thought some more about this. I asked what about my closer relationship with God? I dismissed that. Because that is like saying breathing is the most significant event. It is an essential part of living. Truly, my relationship has enriched the life. His gift to me, my life. My gift to Him, what I became.

I am grateful for his blessing and mercy. More than I deserve. His acknowledged presence in my life is recent. I have had many milestones with Him during the last three years. Mom’s death is one. Like a blanket, my Lord has covered me, secured me and comforted me through these events.

I asked if I would have done anything different if I had known three years ago that my mother would not be here today. Only one thing. I would have picked her a bouquet of wild flowers last July.